Sexual Bloopers 2

~~Yatty~~ · 08-23-2004, 11:55 AM

Well here I am trying to revive a classic.

You guys know what it was.

Well here are my bloopers/down right bad experiences

Losing My virginity

It was new years, 02/03, 3 am or so.

I went back to her house, with her fiance, herself, my sister, my cousin, and my cousins partner at the time.

Her fiance passed out on the floor above us, my cousin and her partner were getting it on, whilst my little sister was there being bored.

Whilst me and the girl, was in her room, we took our clothes. No need for foreplay, well she obvioulsy didn't want it.

So we were at the end of the bed, and getting it on. Same position for 15 minutes, when she then asks "Did you cum yet?" Well I didn't, but it was that boring that I replied "Yes, that was ages ago"

She then got off of me, and put a towel inbetween her legs.

My 2nd time having sex...same girl

Well, this time it was on her fiance's bed. Yes that's right.

It was a whole lot better this time, as I was doing most of the work. First missionary, then half bunnyear. Well, 30 minutes into that, and I stopped, and she said that she came.

She asks me, "Did you cum too?" I just replied no, I was even losing my erection whilst getting it on.

She then tried missionary again, but couldn't stick my **** in, because it was that limp.

I then just said "Jus give me a handjob, you were good at that the other day"

S she did, 10 minutes afterwards...I had cum on my left shoulder...she licked it off though.

My First Blowjob

Oh yeah same girl, in the park 2 blocks away from her fiances place.

Well nothing much happened in this one.

She was just there, blowing me for a good hour. Stopping every so often to get a break, but giving me a handjob whilst taking a break.

After 30 minutes though, I lit up a smoke, as even though I was loving it, I just didn't cum.

Well I never came.

She couldn't go on anymore.

Needless to say...it was the best smoke I've ever had.

So...all this was 2 years ago nearly.

I've never had sex since.

Now, what's your funniest, or worst sexual experience?

Who's the Boss? · 08-23-2004, 11:56 AM

O no u din't /banned

veggie 3.142 · 08-23-2004, 11:57 AM

lilpete86 · 08-23-2004, 11:57 AM

I have to ask, Does the fiance know?

~~Yatty~~ · 08-23-2004, 11:59 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by lilpete86

I have to ask, Does the fiance know?

He caught us once when we were having foreplay and were completely topless on his bed.

Who's the Boss? · 08-23-2004, 12:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Yatty

He caught us once when we were having foreplay and were completely topless on his bed.

Why are you still alive?

~~Yatty~~ · 08-23-2004, 12:01 PM

So when he caught us on his bed, he just said "I can't believe you guys did it on my bed"

So, she gets her clothes on and goes to him.

I just went into the lounge room and played Tony Hawk Pro Skater 4 on ps2

magicbus · 08-23-2004, 12:02 PM

That's funny.

chumpradio · 08-23-2004, 12:03 PM

Yatty, you are going to get banned for this thread.
Try to trick the mods by changing your user title to 'Banned'.
See if you actually end up getting banned or not, because Sex threads are against the rules.

Who's the Boss? · 08-23-2004, 12:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Yatty

So when he caught us on his bed, he just said "I can't believe you guys did it on my bed"

So, she gets her clothes on and goes to him.

I just went into the lounge room and played Tony Hawk Pro Skater 4 on ps2

Then did you fuck his sister and shoot his dog?

Untitled · 08-23-2004, 12:03 PM

Ha ha, there was a program on tele not so long ago called "101 sexual accidents" on channell 4, some guy got a razer stuck up his ureatha, the worst this is they shown the pic, it wasnt nice.

~~Yatty~~ · 08-23-2004, 12:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by chumpradio

Yatty, you are going to get banned for this thread.
Try to trick the mods by changing your user title to 'Banned'.
See if you actually end up getting banned or not, because Sex threads are against the rules.

So what if I get banned?

I'm trying to bring back mx's former glory here, but I'm gonna need help.

duffroxmysox · 08-23-2004, 12:05 PM

08-23-2004, 12:06 PM

Quote:

So what if I get banned?

I'm trying to bring back mx's former glory here, but I'm gonna need help.

Good on ya, it's getting pretty bad now, the pit. Needs a bit of sex to liven it up.

Who's the Boss? · 08-23-2004, 12:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Yatty

So what if I get banned?

I'm trying to bring back mx's former glory here, but I'm gonna need help.

This thread already failed if you hadn't noticed.

~~Yatty~~ · 08-23-2004, 12:07 PM

So where's the other people's stories?

Vitriolic Rage · 08-23-2004, 12:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Untitled258

Ha ha, there was a program on tele not so long ago called "101 sexual accidents" on channell 4, some guy got a razer stuck up his ureatha, the worst this is they shown the pic, it wasnt nice.

Or the guy who poured concrete up his arse

Untitled · 08-23-2004, 12:08 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Yatty

So where's the other people's stories?

Read up, its not me but its a sex acciedent thing that was on tele.

headshrinker · 08-23-2004, 12:08 PM

I think hes lying! It cant be true!

~~Yatty~~ · 08-23-2004, 12:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by headshrinker

I think hes lying! It cant be true!

Oh trust me it is true.

all of it

Not one lie in there

Even the part about me not having sex since

08-23-2004, 11:55 AM	#1
~~Yatty~~ Banned Join Date: Dec 2001 Posts: 307	Sexual Bloopers 2 Well here I am trying to revive a classic. You guys know what it was. Well here are my bloopers/down right bad experiences Losing My virginity It was new years, 02/03, 3 am or so. I went back to her house, with her fiance, herself, my sister, my cousin, and my cousins partner at the time. Her fiance passed out on the floor above us, my cousin and her partner were getting it on, whilst my little sister was there being bored. Whilst me and the girl, was in her room, we took our clothes. No need for foreplay, well she obvioulsy didn't want it. So we were at the end of the bed, and getting it on. Same position for 15 minutes, when she then asks "Did you cum yet?" Well I didn't, but it was that boring that I replied "Yes, that was ages ago" She then got off of me, and put a towel inbetween her legs. My 2nd time having sex...same girl Well, this time it was on her fiance's bed. Yes that's right. It was a whole lot better this time, as I was doing most of the work. First missionary, then half bunnyear. Well, 30 minutes into that, and I stopped, and she said that she came. She asks me, "Did you cum too?" I just replied no, I was even losing my erection whilst getting it on. She then tried missionary again, but couldn't stick my ** in, because it was that limp. I then just said "Jus give me a handjob, you were good at that the other day" S she did, 10 minutes afterwards...I had cum on my left shoulder...she licked it off though. My First Blowjob** Oh yeah same girl, in the park 2 blocks away from her fiances place. Well nothing much happened in this one. She was just there, blowing me for a good hour. Stopping every so often to get a break, but giving me a handjob whilst taking a break. After 30 minutes though, I lit up a smoke, as even though I was loving it, I just didn't cum. Well I never came. She couldn't go on anymore. Needless to say...it was the best smoke I've ever had. So...all this was 2 years ago nearly. I've never had sex since. Now, what's your funniest, or worst sexual experience?

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08-23-2004, 11:56 AM	#2
Who's the Boss? Welcome to the Gun Show Join Date: Feb 2004 Posts: 7,438	O no u din't /banned

08-23-2004, 11:57 AM	#3
veggie 3.142 Anarchy in MXica. Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: England. Posts: 201

08-23-2004, 11:57 AM	#4
lilpete86 Out In The Fields Join Date: Jun 2002 Location: England Posts: 4,846	I have to ask, Does the fiance know?

08-23-2004, 12:01 PM	#7
~~Yatty~~ Banned Join Date: Dec 2001 Posts: 307	So when he caught us on his bed, he just said "I can't believe you guys did it on my bed" So, she gets her clothes on and goes to him. I just went into the lounge room and played Tony Hawk Pro Skater 4 on ps2

08-23-2004, 12:02 PM	#8
magicbus His Dudeness Join Date: May 2004 Location: Blue Jay Way Posts: 10,115	That's funny.

08-23-2004, 12:03 PM	#9
chumpradio manbearpig. Join Date: Aug 2003 Location: Southport, UK Posts: 8,351	Yatty, you are going to get banned for this thread. Try to trick the mods by changing your user title to 'Banned'. See if you actually end up getting banned or not, because Sex threads are against the rules.

08-23-2004, 12:03 PM	#11
Untitled Mind the windows, Tino. Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: Leedsssss Posts: 29,356	Ha ha, there was a program on tele not so long ago called "101 sexual accidents" on channell 4, some guy got a razer stuck up his ureatha, the worst this is they shown the pic, it wasnt nice.

08-23-2004, 12:05 PM	#13
duffroxmysox CatholicSchoolGirlsRule Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: London,UK Posts: 4,692

08-23-2004, 12:07 PM	#16
~~Yatty~~ Banned Join Date: Dec 2001 Posts: 307	So where's the other people's stories?

08-23-2004, 12:08 PM	#19
headshrinker long live rock n roll Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: England Posts: 3,181	I think hes lying! It cant be true!